R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
