def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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