i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Randomize
