Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
