fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
