fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Randomize
