We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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