i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
