The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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