Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
