What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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