another moral hangover. fuck.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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