I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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