It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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