Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
