One girl and one boy is just not enough.
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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