I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Did I show you my penis last night?
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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