Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
