I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize