Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Randomize
