the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
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