don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Randomize
