I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
