Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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