bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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