yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
