mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
