He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize
