I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Randomize
