Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
