We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
being pregnant is like rehab
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
