There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
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