Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
