Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize
