he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Randomize
