Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Randomize
