It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
