Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize
