Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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