too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
