I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Boobs are out for the taking
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
