Sponge bath it is.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
