Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
nutella sex= disaster
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Randomize
