i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
