Pappa wants mamma naked
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
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