If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I don't want my vagina anymore.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
