I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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