I wannas sexs uuuuu
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
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