y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
He felt like a one man threesome
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
