The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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